He won't even care how I feel

On Thursday, the first day that I hung out with Josh. I wasn't actually sure how it gonna go at first, I was a wee bit shy when it comes to him. SHY PEOPLE!! SHY! I never get shy around ANYONE! He's the first who makes me feel all butterflied. I know this is all cheesy and shit, bla bla bla.

I know in the real world it will never work out between me and him. And I need to learn to accept that fact, but it's really hard to get over him! REALLY REALLY HARD. I remember the first time I saw him when I came to the skate park with my cousin. I saw him from a distance, skating, he was wearing tie-dye shirt which was SO HOT. LOL! =D

But it's really depressing when I think about it cuz I can never find ANYONE like him, NOT EVEN CLOSE. Why does it have to be difficult for me?? When I've found the perfect one, there's always something that comes in between that I can't stop or push away.